Today, I am reflecting on how far I've come as a person. The other day I rambled through my jewelry to find this lovely necklace. I begged my parents for a gold nameplate necklace when I was 14. I was obsessed with the nameplate earrings, rings, belt....and I am not ashamed to say I've owned each one of them in my life. The belt is definitely hiding in my closet, but I have all the others in my possession.
I haven't worn this necklace in about 3 years. I wore it briefly as an undergrad, but I stopped wearing it because I felt like it was a fad that no one followed anymore. Thanks to my mom, she kept it in safe possession and it moved with me in August.
This necklace reminds me of a few things. I am obsessed with names and labels. I believe there is something so special about a name/label. Even though we don't have much choice over our names at birth, we have the ability to embody those names or tag on definitions. My first name is completely made up lol. I love it though because it carries a piece of my dad. His name is Tony and it is rumored that I may have been named Tony Reginald for a few days. I am so glad my mom tagged on the -ette hahaha. Good try dad!
I am also reminded of the labels I've embodied as a woman. I have not always seen myself in the most positive light. I've struggled with my personality, my nerdiness, my height, my body shape, my skin...I labeled myself as an outcast. For me, I am so glad that I embody a label that is so much deeper than the eye can see. I am free, redeemed, His, called out, not condemned. Due to the sweet love of my Father and His Son, my identity is strong and anchored <3.
This necklace also reminds me of my 14 year old self <3 I was an ambitious, passionate, and spunky little girl. Even though there has been a lot of challenges along the way, I am reminded of the girl who wanted to go to college and change the world. I am grateful for her bravery and resiliency and it has laid a foundation for how I identify and live my life now.
I turn 25 in less than a month and I am so thankful. Today I am choosing hold tight to that young girl and live golden like the shininess reflected off my necklace.
I am golden
loved
blessed
favored
I am Tonyette
Alana & Tonyette. Two young 20-somethings who have a passion for Christ, food, books, tea, make-up, fashion, healthy living and everything in between.
Thursday, November 5, 2015
Monday, November 2, 2015
Fall reminders // grow up & strong and embrace your hue
Hi everyone!
It's been a while since I've posted - graduate school has been really hectic. I finally had some moments tonight where I intentionally took some time for myself. Over the past two weeks, I have been battling with what type of student I was and who I am now. In undergrad here at UVA, there was definitely this mentality among college students that you have to forsake so much of yourself for the sake of making a grade. I now know I am much more than a grade and my major. I now know that I am called to be a student for this season. I am Tonyette and I happen to be a graduate student. BUT, I am not defined by it - I define WHY I am here and WHAT I will do with my degree.
In 2011, I definitely sacrificed my peace in order to be perfect and I blinked and the season changed. I literally....missed....Fall that year. I don't remember what happened, I just remember being in my thoughts and my world. I don't really remember much about anything, I was in a fog. While I am now able to label what happened to me as depression, I believe my actions and striving kept me from truly taking in the little moments of life. I was incredibly sad that I let my favorite season move past me.
Although my memory was hazy, I remember one event that gave me a sense of hope and stillness. I attended Trick or Treating on the Lawn and as I watched happy children, dogs, and families, I was reminded of the beauty of human connection and love. I remember snapping photos of the entire lawn and I went back to that photo to remind myself to be still.
On Friday I attended this event and I reflected on my life journey and growth. I laughed with my amazing classmates and witnessed the beauty of human connection and love. I saw the creativity manifested in the costumes and the love in the eyes of parents as they watched their children. The weather was crisp and cool and I felt the crunch of the leaves beneath my feet. Overall, Friday evening reminded me to be still and cherish the moments.
Fall is such a special season for me. It marks a time when I reflect on the last few weeks before my birthday. The scarves, boots, and tights become my besties. Most of all, the colors of the trees remind me of growth and change. I find it amazing that trees just grow, they don't possess the means for comparison- they grow up and strong. In the fall, each tree is a different color - red, orange, gold, yellow, brown, burgundy, etc. They grow amongst one another, yet they are vastly different.
I can't help to think that is the way we should look at the world. Instead of comparing ourselves to the next person, what if we could grow up and strong and embrace our different hues? What if we happily watched our friends and family flourish as we thrive as well?
Don't allow life's circumstances or personal goals to stop you from seeing what is happening around you. Don't allow yourself to blink another moment without being present.
May your joy be palpable.
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| Trick or Treating on the Lawn 2015 |
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Sunday, October 11, 2015
Get up, get dressed, embrace the random and live in purpose.
For the past three weeks, I've been battling a really icky and horrible sinus infection. As a result, I just felt like I've been put behind in my relationships, school work, and physical upkeep. I spent the past week, preparing for tests and papers and I literally felt uneasy. I became very overwhelmed by cracking open a school book or researching for my papers. I realized that I wasn't leaning into my purpose and not giving myself grace.
My friend recently reminded me that we do have to take our crafts seriously in order to fully operate in them. Whether that entails studying for a test, training for a marathon, or working a carnival as outreach, we have to take fully embrace the purpose. Yesterday I was reminded that I can give myself grace as I embrace my purpose.
I woke up and immediately threw on an outfit because I didn't know if I would be meeting my mentor at a cafe that morning or if I would be relocating to study. My mentor held Bible study here at my place and I kept this outfit on. At the end of the study, she told me she liked my outfit and we randomly had a mini photoshoot outside of my living community. I wore the outfit because it made me feel good. In the randomness of the "shoot" - I was reminded to seize opportunities and embrace the here and now.
My friend recently reminded me that we do have to take our crafts seriously in order to fully operate in them. Whether that entails studying for a test, training for a marathon, or working a carnival as outreach, we have to take fully embrace the purpose. Yesterday I was reminded that I can give myself grace as I embrace my purpose.
I woke up and immediately threw on an outfit because I didn't know if I would be meeting my mentor at a cafe that morning or if I would be relocating to study. My mentor held Bible study here at my place and I kept this outfit on. At the end of the study, she told me she liked my outfit and we randomly had a mini photoshoot outside of my living community. I wore the outfit because it made me feel good. In the randomness of the "shoot" - I was reminded to seize opportunities and embrace the here and now.
Outfit:
Levi's Jean Jacket
Top from Marshall's
Skirt from Old Navy
Heels from J.Crew
Earrings and Necklace from Target
I'm totally embracing the randomness and the here and now.
Remember, no matter what season you are in, you still have purpose <3
xoxo,
Tonyette
Saturday, October 3, 2015
THE Graduate School App Process!
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| Photo courtesy of Relentlesswriters.blogspot.com/ 2015/03/find-your-passion-write-your-stories.html |
For me personally, I only looked at Masters of Education degree programs for Counselor Education. As a result, I will only talk from the experience I have in applying to these programs. If I could condense my graduate application experience - I would definitely sum of 8 points you can consider :)
Although I decided to wait, I have plenty of friends who decided to go straight to graduate school. These young ladies and men are passionate about their disciplines. In short, reflect on your passion and heart for a topic before committing to it <3
....whew....let me get off my soapbox
| Photo courtesy of racetoamillion.co.uk/blog/ wp-content/uploads/2008/04/research-icon1.jpg |
3.) STUDY for the GRE : I am laughing at this one because I honestly thought that this test was my chance of redemption for my poor SAT/ACT study habits. This time around, I bought myself a study book and made flash cards. The Cracking the GRE study guide was definitely my " bae" during Fall 2014. As I look back, I don't think it helped much with math, but it definitely prepared me for the Verbal and Analytical Writing sections. I would suggest the Kaplan GRE study guide because it really has higher reviews than the Princeton Review. Try to limit your studying to a certain timeframe to insure you retain the techniques (1- 1/2 months). I studied from very late September to mid November. After 1 1/2 months of studying I think I hit my study threshold...or tolerance haha. REMEMBER the GRE is a test measuring your ability to analyze and use certain techniques to answer the problems - not a test measuring your ability to memorize.
4.) Reach out to potential recommenders EARLY : I contacted my former professors and supervisors in early September to let them know I would be applying to graduate school. In addition, I followed up in late October and November to let them know I would be using their information in my application.
5.) Write your heart on your sleeve : When writing your personal statements - BE PERSONAL. Write about your personal experiences and don't be afraid to brag on yourself and your background. Make sure you address every piece of the topic and adhere to the word limits. In addition, pull in key pieces from the program and address how the program will shape you and what you could give to the program (if applicable).
6.) Interview:In contrast to the undergraduate application process, most programs will want to schedule an interview with you! You will either be invited or the interview will be a part of the application process. Some schools may not conduct interviews. I encountered all three cases! Stay flexible and confident during the interview process. I had interviews that were canceled due to snowstorms. Flexibility is key when you have to reschedule or travel a lot. Read up on the program or brainstorm possible interview questions. Survey your closet and see if you have appropriate business or business casual wear (I would suggest this be done a week in advance). Try to strike a balance between your individual style and professionalism. For my interview days, I wore a black cardigan, a black top with ruffled sleeves (I thought it represented my personal style), gray slacks, and heels ( bring flats ladies). During interview day, truly consider whether the program and professors will fit your needs. BE CONFIDENT and OWN YOUR BACKGROUND!
7.) Follow your heart: When you receive your acceptances, consider which program will fit your needs, your learning style and your personality. Definitely consider tuition rates, job opportunities, and environment. Personally, I would encourage you to follow your heart when picking your program. I ended up coming back to my Alma Mater. I was super passionate about experiencing a different campus. I tried to rationalize why I should go elsewhere. I realized this program was the one for me. I am so incredibly grateful for my awesome professors and my cohort.
8.) Say Thanks : Write thank you notes to your recommenders and verbally thank those who supported you through the process. My parents, sister, friends, and co-workers were so amazing during the process.
I really hope this was helpful and I tried to give my honest advice about the graduate school application process. Feel free to email me at tonyettew@gmail.com if you have any questions OR leave a question or comment at the end of this post.
xoxo,
Tonyette
Sunday, September 20, 2015
Outfit of the Day - Darling Edition :)
Hi everyone!
I hope you all are doing well! Just wanted to stop by with a quick OOTD for this beautiful Sunday afternoon.
I can't believe it is almost Fall! I absolutely LOVE this season and the weather.
Last week a friend and I stumbled upon this beautiful consignment shop called Darling on the Downtown mall in Charlottesville. When I walked in - I was drawn by the layout of the store and just the beautiful, reaffirming sayings on the walls and the dressing room doors for every women to see. The owners are Linnea and Megan and they carefully pick their pieces to fit many different women. In addition, they sell the furniture which holds the clothes, as well as beautiful jewelry, soaps, cards from local artisans.
All photos taken directly from ShopatDarling.com
This particular shop really sparked my interest in really sharpening my style and my sorta-kinda capsule wardrobe. I am currently in the process of rebuilding my wardrobe. I gave away almost all of my things. It really just hit me that I don't really have the comfort of excess clothing. In August, it felt right because I needed a fresh perspective that was free from clutter. That is still the case right now, but it is a little daunting to have to get creative with my clothes and not spend a lot.
So when I found out about Darling, I definitely felt like I was at home. I love consignment shops and thrifting, but I really lost touch with it in the last three years. Since I am now rebuilding my closet, it want to carefully purchase things I like for great prices. Darling presented me with an opportunity to do so!
I knew I needed more white/cream in my closet and I found J.Crew silk blouse for less than 12 dollars! I finally wore it today to church. I love the blouse, but I was having a mental block because I was freaking out about how many clothes I didn't have anymore :/ I decided to pair it with jeans, heels, and a blazer. I really received a lot of compliments and I thought it was really a blessing due to the fact that I didn't think I paired the shirt that well this morning.
Here's a photo!
I paired the top with an Express blazer (purchased at Marshall's), Levi jeans (purchased at Marshall's) and J.Crew heels (purchased at J.Crew Clearance Center in Lynchburg VA.) I am loving my new blouse and this will definitely be a staple for the Fall.
Make sure you check out Darling's website which is full of updates, styling tips, and blog posts.
I also snapped this photo before leaving the store
I truly believe this is fitting in how we can create beautiful things by exercising our creativity.
xoxo,
Tonyette
Monday, September 7, 2015
Transitions and New Seasons
Hi all:)
I am still blogging, there's just been A LOT of things going on since mid-July. As Alana knows, I have done a lot of self-reflection in regards to myself, the people around me, and God's role in all of this. I can't say that August was the easiest, but I have grown a lot.
In addition to heavy reflection, I tremendously downsized my closet. After realizing how much stuff I accumulated and just the heaviness I felt, I needed to declutter all parts of my life - starting with my closet. When I moved back home, I was so blown away and embarrassed by all the clothes I had (I needed more than 2 closets). I couldn't believe I allowed myself to not use so much. I basically sold some clothes and gave away the rest. I am still trying to process my closet and it's much smaller size. I also sold a lot of things and recycled a bunch of papers I held onto. I didn't to move to my new city with a lot of stuff. I truly wanted my new season to be reminiscent of where I am right now as a person. I want to live light, pack light, and be Christ's light <3
I am in graduate school and I am in a counselor education program. I looooove it. I want to do a post on my process of applying to schools and finding the perfect program.
I am hoping to post very soon - within the next week or so. Hang tight
btw, what would happen if our faith allowed us to keep our hopes up? What if they were so high and beautiful?
I am still blogging, there's just been A LOT of things going on since mid-July. As Alana knows, I have done a lot of self-reflection in regards to myself, the people around me, and God's role in all of this. I can't say that August was the easiest, but I have grown a lot.
In addition to heavy reflection, I tremendously downsized my closet. After realizing how much stuff I accumulated and just the heaviness I felt, I needed to declutter all parts of my life - starting with my closet. When I moved back home, I was so blown away and embarrassed by all the clothes I had (I needed more than 2 closets). I couldn't believe I allowed myself to not use so much. I basically sold some clothes and gave away the rest. I am still trying to process my closet and it's much smaller size. I also sold a lot of things and recycled a bunch of papers I held onto. I didn't to move to my new city with a lot of stuff. I truly wanted my new season to be reminiscent of where I am right now as a person. I want to live light, pack light, and be Christ's light <3
I am in graduate school and I am in a counselor education program. I looooove it. I want to do a post on my process of applying to schools and finding the perfect program.
I am hoping to post very soon - within the next week or so. Hang tight
btw, what would happen if our faith allowed us to keep our hopes up? What if they were so high and beautiful?
xoxo,
Tonyette
Sunday, August 30, 2015
Nails 101: The Basics of Grooming
I get a lot of questions about my
nails. I've always done my own nails and I have never been to a salon to get
them done. At this point, I feel as if I don't need to pay anyone to give me a manicure.
Through trial and error over the years I have come up with many tips and trips
that help me to achieve a professional looking manicure without the salon price
tag. I'm going to have a few posts all about nails to answer a lot of the
questions I've gotten over the years.
For the first nail related post, I'm
going to start with the basics of grooming the nail to prep it for painting.
Tools
Needed:
1.
Crystal Nail File
2.
Cuticle Trimmer
3.
Cuticle Remover
4.
Cuticle Stick
5.
Cuticle Cream/Balm
6.
Hand Cream
Step
One: Cuticles
The key to a polished, professional
looking manicure is neatly groomed cuticles. When the cuticles are over grown
and ragged, it can make the entire manicure look sloppy. Think of your cuticles
as the picture frame that ties everything together. You wouldn't put a $1 plastic
frame on the Mona Lisa, would you?
1.
The first thing I use to keep my
cuticles in check is a cuticle trimmer .
There are some people who are avidly against cuticle trimmers. What it does is
trim the excess skin off, making the cuticle instantly shorter and neater.
However, it can make the cuticle grow back faster and thicker. I don't have any
issues with this, mainly because I do this weekly and this is not the sole
method I use to groom my cuticles. Please be careful when using a cuticle
trimmer. Use it to trim off the dead skin around the nail like hangnails, or
any skin that has grown over the nail and is starting to lift off. You DO NOT
want to press down too hard or cut into the cuticle bed. This could cause
damage to the cuticle bed and also cause infection. That is why I am a fan of
the cuticle trimmer from Revlon that is linked above. It’s not too dull or too
sharp, which prevents you from going a little crazy; it will just get the dead
skin. If you are anti-cuticle trimmers, then by all means skip this step.
2.
The second thing I use on my cuticles
is a gel cuticle remover. My current favorite is the Sally Hansen Instant Cuticle Remover. After I've trimmed my cuticles, I apply a small amount of the cuticle remover
to each cuticle and then spread it around with a cuticle stick. I
let it sit for about a minute and then gently use the cuticle stick remove any
extra dead skin and push the cuticle back. Wipe this off and then wash your
hands. Think of this step as if you're exfoliating the nail. It gently lifts up
dead skin cells, leaving the cuticles neat and the nail nicely groomed.
Step
Two: Filing and Shaping the Nail
It's time to put down the nail clippers
and the sand paper emery boards. In my opinion, the best way to shorten, shape
and file your nails is with a crystal file.
Nail clippers can cause the nail to split and peel, especially for those with
weak nails. Emery boards can also be too rough on the nail and cause splitting.
I personally never cared for how emery boards feel against my nail while
filing. A quality glass file effectively shortens the nail through filing and
creates a smooth edge with no splitting or peeling. Over time, you'll have
stronger nails. A glass file can also last a life time, that is if you don't
drop it! I paid about $7 for a quality glass file on Amazon back on 2011 and
it's still going strong. You may initially think that paying upwards of $10 for
a nail file is a tad ridiculous, but I assure you, it’s a great investment and
will pay for itself, as it should last you a lifetime opposed to constantly
purchasing emery boards that need to be replaced often.
To shape my nails, I simply file back
and forth in a straight line. Some suggest that you should only file in one
direction because the back and forth motion can weaken the nail. I have never
experienced this, but file in whichever direction you prefer and works best for
you.
My favorite nail shape is a short, square
nail. I file the nail down in a straight line to the desired length and then
softly round out the edges so the points of the nail aren’t to sharp. You may
need to take the glass file and gently run it underneath the nail to remove any
nail remnants from filing.
**QUICK
TIP: To best achieve the perfect shape of whatever your desire nail shape may
be (round, pointed, square, etc.), file your nails right before removing you
old manicure. This way, you won't get distracted by you natural nail line,
which naturally grows out unevenly. Having nail polish already on the nail when
you file helps you to really see the shape you are making!
Step
Three: Moisturize!
You can file your nails perfectly and
have pristine cuticles, but if you aren't constantly pampering and moisturizing
your hands afterwards, it's a bit of a waste. To maintain the health of your
nails you need to moisturize them and do it often!
·
Cuticle
Creams: Cuticle creams are especially formulated with the
cuticles in mind. They are often times richer and more concentrated than hand
creams and also have ingredients that help to strengthen nails. Consistent use
of a cuticle cream helps to prevent peeling and splitting nails, dry and
peeling cuticles and hang nails.
o
Recommendations:
1.
Burt's Bees Lemon Butter Cuticle Cream. This
is a staple product for me. It has a light, fresh lemon scent and does an
excellent job of moisturizing and nourishing cuticles. I prefer to use this
during the day, throughout the day as I remember. If my nails are being
temperamental and are peeling just a bit, this sorts it out. It has more of a
balm texture than that of a cream, so it's not heavy or sticky on this skin. A
little goes a long way and at just $5-6 per tin, you can't beat the value!
2.
Christian Dior Abricot Nail Creme. I
discovered this heavy-duty gem this past winter when it was so cold and so dry
outside that my hands literally hurt from how dry my skin was. None of my
lotions and potions were saving my skin. I stumbled upon the Christian Dior
Abricot Nail Creme online and it had great reviews so I decided to take the
plunge; a $27 plunge. I know! I know! But it was so worth it! This product is
heavy, thick, rich, emollient and all those good words! Because it is so gooey,
it is suggested for nighttime use. When applied at night before bed, it brings
your cuticles back to life the next morning and the more you use it, the better
the results. I don't much care for the smell, but I'll deal with it because I
no longer have to suffer from dry winter skin. Never underestimate the power of
eBay. Check there so see if you can find it for a few bucks cheaper.
·
Hand
Creams: Much like cuticle creams, avidly using hand creams keeps
your hands in tip-top shape. They moisturize the nails and cuticles, but
predominately keep your hands soft and provide a line of defense against the
elements when used regularly, throughout the day.
o
Recommendations:
1.
LUSH Helping Hands. I
also discovered this product this past winter when my hands were painfully dry.
I was in the market for a heavier hand cream to use at night and this fit the
bill. It has soothing ingredients like chamomile, marigold and lavender to
provide relief for painful hands. A little goes a long way and I always wake up
with super soft hands the next morning. This is on the pricey side; 3.5 ounces
will set you back $18.95, but it's a quality product with wholesome ingredients
that will last you a while. Side note: I
recently applied this to sunburned arms at night and woke up with soothed skin
that was not angry and pink. Brillant!
2. Crabtree & Evelyn Verbana and Lavender Hand Therapy. Any
scent/formulation of the Crabtree & Evelyn hand creams is good so just pick
your poison! Right now I'm really into the Verbana and Lavender scent; it's
bright but warm. These hand creams are not too heavy so they are great for daytime
use. They just get the job done. The 3.5 ounce tubes retail for $22, but I
often find them at my local TJ Maxx for around $7, so when I see them, I stock
up!
I know this post was long, but I hope
it was helpful! I have a few more of these Nail 101 posts planned, so keep your
eyes peels for the next post in the series on how to actually paint your nails
perfectly (probably the top question I'm asked!).
-
Alana
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